I Have Discovered a Conspiracy

[snurri]

The problem is, you are all in on it. Well, the vast majority of you, anyway. Possibly not you, with the celery stuck between your teeth. Or you in the back with the goggle eyes. But the rest of you, ooohhh! I feel so betrayed. CARE TO EXPLAIN YOURSELVES?!?

Comments

[sarah-prineas.livejournal.com]

You're only just figuring this out?

[snurri.livejournal.com]

Why, you . . . why?!? Why?!?

[wheatland-press.livejournal.com]

You're just over tired from the holiday...here, this potion will help you feel better.

[secritcrush.livejournal.com]

I did it for the pie.

mmmmm pie.

[silk-noir.livejournal.com]

Curse our sudden but inevitable betrayal!

[10yroldwhizkid.livejournal.com]

A wise sage once said to me, sometimes you gotta hustle to get by. I learned this when I was 14 and have kept it close in my heart ever since.

[rnb.livejournal.com]

You can always be sure that I'm not in on any kind of conspiracy. They just sound like too much goddamn work.

pronoia

[rsheslin.livejournal.com]

But it's for your own good!

[snurri.livejournal.com]

(Runs screaming from offered potion.)

[snurri.livejournal.com]

I see. It takes very little to buy your loyalty, in other words.

[snurri.livejournal.com]

Never trust a carnivore!

[snurri.livejournal.com]

Oh, well that makes se--HEY YOU ARE MAKING EXCUSES FOR YOUR SHADY DEALINGS!

[snurri.livejournal.com]

You'd think so, but apparently it mostly involves not talking about stuff.

Re: pronoia

[snurri.livejournal.com]

Oh, and you just made that decision for me, did you?

Re: pronoia

[rsheslin.livejournal.com]

Ah, but wouldn't you like to know what information we have that makes such a decision an obvious choice?

[grahamsleight.livejournal.com]

"A paranoid is a guy who's just figured out what's going on."
- William S. Burroughs, who's also in on it.

[secritcrush.livejournal.com]

Have you ever tried to make a good pie?

mmmm pie

Re: pronoia

[snurri.livejournal.com]

NO.

Yes.

NO!!!

[snurri.livejournal.com]

That's why they killed him!

[grahamsleight.livejournal.com]

Three guesses who's next.

[wheatland-press.livejournal.com]

Tsk tsk tsk...how do you ever expect to get Better?

[jonhansen.livejournal.com]

How 'bout we cut you in on the deal? C'mon, you'll get a neat set of robes! With matching ornamental daggers!

[bondgwendabond.livejournal.com]

The moon is on the rise.

[haddayr.livejournal.com]

no.

[snurri.livejournal.com]

Feh. If you'd said "capes" and "katanas," then maybe. But robes? Please.

[snurri.livejournal.com]

ARE YOU CALLING ME A LUNATIC?!?

[snurri.livejournal.com]

Oh, all right then.

Dammit.

[bondgwendabond.livejournal.com]

No, a WEREWOLF!

[carnwrite.livejournal.com]

So, uh... you know about the weasels, huh? Well, you may think you know... heheheh ;)

[snurri.livejournal.com]

NOT HELPING.

[sarah-prineas.livejournal.com]

Just because, really.

[scarypudding.livejournal.com]

I put them up to it.

[jonhansen.livejournal.com]

That's inner circle stuff. You'll need to put in some time as a spearcarrier first.

[snurri.livejournal.com]

That would explain a lot, seeing as how you're behind the death of SFWA. And SF. And probably other stuff I can't think of right now.

[used_songs]

!

[snurri.livejournal.com]

Oh, act all innocent, will ya?

[barbmg.livejournal.com]

I meant to tell you, then totally forgot.

[snurri.livejournal.com]

Oh. Well, that's all right the--HEY WAIT A MINUTE.