The New Indiana Jones Movie Re-Considered As a Submission To a Semi-Pro Writer's Group [SPOILERS]

Critique by Dave

George:

You know I like these stories, and I was excited to read this. I've been hard on your last few submissions, but I was hoping this would be a return to form. I do think there's some good stuff in here--the action scenes, for the most part, are really well done--but in the end I had a lot of problems with it.

( I hate to say it, but you lost me right at the beginning. )