Chalkbot Remains

[snurri]

Chalkbot Remains
Originally uploaded by Snurri

"If the Lancaster Bridge Troll is an example of civic initiative leading to positive change, the case of Maeve Spoondale is an example of the infernal paving of good intentions. Spoondale, a kindergarten teacher and amateur sculptor, spent the days following the Exile in a state of high anxiety, the schools being closed and lacking clay for her usual hobby work. Being, it seems, an unusually anxious person with (in her words) 'nervous hands,' Spoondale worked herself into a frenzy of inactivity. 'I was afraid to leave the house,' she told Channel 8 later, before it all went wrong. 'I couldn't watch my programs, and I couldn't make my babies.' (Spoondale's sculptures before the Exile were of lumpish figures which she referred to as raccoons, despite their closer resemblance to 'fat salamanders wearing Mickey Mouse ears,' according to the famous art critic and drunk Templeton Liu.) . . . In distress Spoondale began to work with the materials at hand, attempting to create a classroom of students made from toothpicks, cotton swabs, and finally several dozen boxes of chalk from school which she had 'in storage' at her home. With these she created simple figures, six pieces each, with a torso, head, arms and legs--all of matching colors, 'So they wouldn't be confused.' Ms. Spoondale has never revealed what substance she used to bind the pieces to one another. . . . Spoondale set her finished creatures up in a classroom on her dining room table and began to lecture them. 'Oh, I was in something of a state,' she told Channel 8. 'I don't recall everything we talked about. Hygiene, and good manners, and neighborhood safety, and fairy stories. A few times I had to scold them. I remember that it was seven-thirty sharp when we started, and three when I let them go.' Upon further questioning from the Channel 8 interviewer, Spoondale revealed that six days had elapsed in addition to those seven-and-a-half hours. . . . Spoondale fell asleep soon after dismissing her class, and when she woke her chalk pupils were gone. Unworried, she began to assemble more students. . . . At first the free-roaming creatures, soon dubbed 'chalkbots,' seemed entirely benign; they scratched hopscotch courts into the sidewalk, wrote 'WASH YOUR HANDS' in public restrooms, and scrawled 'SOMEBODY LOVES YOU' on the streets. A gang of chalkbots wrote the story of Little Red Riding Hood on the concrete next to the Roosevelt Park fountain, while others traveled the neighborhoods tutoring children on basic addition. A pattern emerged: blue chalkbots were concerned with sanitary living, yellow chalkbots with safety, green chalkbots with the recounting of fables. Purples--fond of nursery rhymes and nonsense poems--became associated with good luck, and whites with good weather, thanks to their pronounced timidity during inclement weather. . . . Ms. Spoondale was celebrated for her creations, despite her obvious peculiarity and the fact that whatever she had done seemed to have been accidental. She embraced her new status as a celebrity, only to have it fall to pieces. . . . Soon after her Channel 8 debut, reports began to circulate of chalkbots who, as they left their messages, would scream in agony. A frequent video loop on Channel Spider to this day is that of a pink chalkbot writing 'MIND YOUR PS AND QS' on a bus stop with its head, shrieking continuously; the sound is rather like what one imagines a tooth scraping on a whetstone might produce. . . . Other chalkbots were seen to scrawl obscenities, or to gather in packs to surround and murder squirrels. Messages like 'SMASH THE HINGES' and 'EAT BOTTLE GLASS' began to appear with alarming consistency. Finally, internecine warfare began to take place between armies of different-colored chalkbots. Afterwards, the sites of such battles were strewn with severed limbs, many of which were scavenged by previously wounded chalkbots and reattached; because of this many multi-colored 'bots came into existence. . . . Countless theories have been put forth as to the cause of the breakdown of the chalkbots (most of which include Ms. Spoondale's apparent derangement as a factor): an unusual attunement to the city's confinement, the weakness of the material, even simple existential despair. . . . Today few single-colored chalkbots remain, although there are those who theorize that the legendary Mad Green is not a sewer gator at all, but a stumpy green chalkbot named Aesop. Mêlées consisting of hordes of multicolored 'bots are frequent, and include such innovations as popsicle stick spears and plastic catapults used to launch small fireworks. Despite the size of the combatants, humans and their pets are advised to steer clear of these conflicts. . . . As to Maeve Spoondale, she disappeared from her home one night in 1974. Some believe that she continues to produce chalkbots from hiding, but certain of her neighbors have spoken of odd noises on the night of her disappearance, and colored markings found on her doorstep in the morning. They believe that her creations carried her away." (p.292-4)

Comments

[the-flea-king.livejournal.com]

Cant' believe I missed this earlier. I hate you for this one. I wish this had been my idea. :) So great.

[snurri.livejournal.com]

Hate, in this case, is high praise! Thanks, Jer :-)