Reconstruct My Night

[snurri]

I live alone. Last night I went to sleep in my bed sometime after 2 AM. I woke up at 6:30 AM on the couch. In addition, the bath towel was not on the towel rack but draped over the arm of my desk chair.

If any of y'all could tell me what I was up to during those 4 1/2 hours I'd be grateful.

Comments

[ajjones.livejournal.com]

Check for alien probes.

[snurri.livejournal.com]

Nothing in the usual orifices . . .

[used_songs]

You, my friend, were abducted by aliens.

[snurri.livejournal.com]

Why did they bring me back?!?

[used_songs]

I know! I'm sorry.

[ethereal-lad.livejournal.com]

Lay off the ambien!

[snurri.livejournal.com]

Never touch the stuff. I'd had a couple glasses of wine early in the evening, but I was more or less sober when I went to bed.

[songwind.livejournal.com]

I don't want to tell you. But you should be pleased to know that they decided not to press charges.

[le-trombone.livejournal.com]

How long did it take to clean up the blood?

[songwind.livejournal.com]

The blood was easy.

The Cheez Whiz, though. *shudder*

[snurri.livejournal.com]

They? THEY?!?

[barthanderson.livejournal.com]

That was me. Thanks for the shower, honeypants. ;)

[snurri.livejournal.com]

Snerk!

[barthanderson.livejournal.com]

That's not what you said last night!

[justinhowe.livejournal.com]

You want pictures or would you prefer to wait and see it on youtube?

[snurri.livejournal.com]

What kind of pictures?

[justinhowe.livejournal.com]

The kind that are illegal to transport across state lines.

[matociquala.livejournal.com]

Do you feel suspiciously clean?

[snurri.livejournal.com]

Only behind my ears.

[matociquala.livejournal.com]

Any unexplained aches or abrasions?

[snurri.livejournal.com]

Only EVERYWHERE.

[matociquala.livejournal.com]

I'm going to have to go with having been ridden by a loa, I think.

At least he brought you back home and cleaned you up when he was done with you. That's unusual consideration.

[haddayr.livejournal.com]

Honey, I'd tell you but then my marriage would be in grave peril.

I, um, think you should wash the towel.

[snurri.livejournal.com]

I do not wish to be associated with any depravity, now.

Not if I'm not going to remember it, anyway.

[haddayr.livejournal.com]

Oh, sex wasn't involved. It's just that Jan's a vegetarian and frowns upon animal sacri—

Oh. I guess what we did was still depraved. nevermind.

[davidbeall.livejournal.com]

You so know you used the towel as a cape while you flew tight circles high above the Metrodome.

[snurri.livejournal.com]

No wonder I'm still exhausted.

[janradder.livejournal.com]

It's actually all the towel's fault. It couldn't sleep, got lonely, and wanted some company.

[snurri.livejournal.com]

Terrycloth is so damn needy.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_stranger_here/]

Yep, I'm going with "superpower fugue state". If only because I have seen quite a lot of towel-as-cape running around the house this summer. I only hope you're a superhero and not a supervillain.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_stranger_here/]

Omigosh! You are having superpowers and not realizing it!

[snurri.livejournal.com]

How freakishly apt!

[snurri.livejournal.com]

I'm more of a SuperTrueNeutral kinda guy.

[rnb.livejournal.com]

I'm surprised at how often I end up playing this game with my friends, although usually it involves mythological quantities of beer and large pools of blood.

[snurri.livejournal.com]

I wasn't even drinking! (Much.)

[jocelina.livejournal.com]

You don't remember? Now my feelings and my left foot are hurt.

[snurri.livejournal.com]

OK now you're just messing with me. I'm pretty sure I would remember THAT.

(We are talking about nocturnal roller derby, right?)

[mythusmage.livejournal.com]

Let me just say that you need to practice your teleportation some more. You keep forgetting to adjust for changes in latitude and altitude, and you have a bad tendency to go sideways and up in time during your jaunts. BTW, all on the crew say that heating up the water in an olympic sized swimming pool by twenty degrees in less than a second is impressive.

On the other hand, nobody at the lab is going to believe that a normal, healthy, cancer free human being could ever have 50 chromosomes. Nope, we have 46. The next time you pop in we'll make sure to provide some fake DNA for you to provide immigration when they drop by.

[snurri.livejournal.com]

Oh, now I remember!

Maybe y'all could stock up on Nutter Butters as well. Jaunting is hungry work.

[rsheslin.livejournal.com]

The only time I did something similar to that is the '89 quake when I woke up trying to figure out how I'd ended up in a doorway (three cheers for growing up in SoCal!)

Seriously, though, regardless of what everyone else says, I don't think you have any reason to be ashamed of what you did. The muskrat... well, yeah, it should be ashamed, but you're golden. Except for maybe that bit with the eggplant.

[snurri.livejournal.com]

WHAT DID YOU ALL COME OVER TO WATCH ME IN MY SLEEP OR WHAT

[rsheslin.livejournal.com]

Well, of course not. That's what webcams are for. (Besides, we wouldn't really call it sleeping, now, would we?)

[msbelle.livejournal.com]

Good to see you again, Mr. Durden.

[snurri.livejournal.com]

You wake up at Seatac, SFO, LAX. You wake up at O'Hare, Dallas-Fort Worth, BWI. Pacific, mountain, central. Lose an hour, gain an hour. This is your life, and it's ending one minute at a time. You wake up at Air Harbor International. If you wake up at a different time, in a different place, could you wake up as a different person?